Skip to main content

Do you want to get married?

I don't know about you, but the question I have heard since the age of sixteen was, "when are you getting married?" My mother claims that our extended family was always joking when they asked me this question, but I feel like the frequency and repetitiveness of the question means that this was no joke: Everyone expects me to get married. 

This is the culture I grew up in. Marriage was a box to be ticked on the list of my life accomplishments. I am almost 24 now, and for some reason, I can feel the pressure of this question even more acutely. It doesn't matter what I am doing in other aspects of my life, according to many in my life the one thing I should accomplish is marriage and motherhood. Unfortunately, I have started to wonder if this is something I even want...why do people get married?

Committed

This is what brought me to Committed by Elizabeth Gilbert, who is known for her book, Eat Pray Love. In this next step of Gilbert's journey, she and her partner Felipe are left with no other choice but to get married if they want to live together in the US. For this couple, committing to each other was not their fear, it was their fear of the harsh nature of divorce, and their promise to never get married. With no other choice, Gilbert and her partner move abroad while they wait for Felipe's fiancé visa, and during this time she embarks on a new journey, talking to people about why they chose to get married and what taking that step meant to them. 

I loved this book because Gilbert was able to seamlessly intertwine her own thoughts with a broader historical and cultural picture, and she acknowledged many perspectives surrounding the concept of marriage. However, I feel that it is important to note that Gilbert is not attacking marriage; making that commitment can be a beautiful and romantic thing, and asking why people take this step in their lives was important for her as she came to terms with having to do it again. 

This story was beautifully written, and worth 4 stars. To share any thoughts, questions or review requests, please comment below, email me (theopinionatedbookworm@gmail.com) or follow me on Instagram (@theopinionatedbookworm1).

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The House of the Spirits

A good friend of mine once told me, "if a book has a rating of 4 or more stars on Goodreads, it is probably a safe bet that you will like it." This is why I almost always choose my books by their Goodreads rating, a strategy I am currently rethinking after reading The House of the Spirits by Isabel Allende. With an average rating of 4.23/5 on Goodreads, I thought I was going to love this book, and for the first four chapters, I did. However, as the story progressed I started to struggle, which has led me to believe that when choosing books I might need to employ tactics that do not solely rely on Goodreads ratings. The Patriarch Isabel Allende's novel takes place in early to mid twentieth century Chile, and tells the story of landowner Esteban Trueba, a man who went from rags to riches using nothing but his mother's honourable last name. Esteban is a classic example of an upperclass patriarch; he believed that by going back to the land of his mother's fami...
Post a Comment
Read more

Abensa Egralve Uffubensu

 "And so, with laughter and love, we lived happily ever after" (232). Do you have a book that you turn to when you're sad? My happy book is Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine, and I found comfort in Ella's journey once again while I was dealing with a small heartache. I always thought it was a wonderful interpretation of Cinderella, and I love how all the characters have a rich backstory, from the evil stepsisters, to Prince Charmont, Mandy the Cook/Fairy Godmother and Ella's best friend Areida. Everyone has a story, rounding out the plot of the novel. When she was a child, Ella was given a gift (or a curse, depending on how you look at it), by the fairy Lucinda, and since then she has always had to obey any command anyone gives her. Her mother forbids her from telling anyone about the curse (not that she would), but when her mother passes away, there is no one who can help Ella defeat the curse. Her father eventually remarries, bringing Ella two stepsisters, H...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Will. The Words. The Way.

I started 2020 by reading The Ten Thousand Doors of January  by Alix E. Harrow, and although this past year has been hard for so many, for me, it was also one of adventure. I was accepted to my dream university, but prohibited from pursuing that particular adventure by events that we are all well aware of. I briefly lost my job, but became closer with my coworkers because of it. And I was hurt deeply by someone I trusted, but eventually moved on. I cannot say that Harrow's magical words from her debut novel were the reason behind all of these adventures, but I must admit that I was inspired by January to become more resilient, so I find it fitting that I start 2021 with Harrow's second novel, The Once and Future Witches.  The Once and Future Witches Juniper, Agnes and Bella are three sisters that were separated, but somehow found each other again in the city of New Salem, a place where women who rally for the right to vote are accused of witching. "But witching is nothing ...
Post a Comment
Read more